Thursday 4 November 2010

Entente Incordial

I hear we've concluded a Defence Treaty with France.

Why?

Everyone knows that Italian tanks have four reverse gears and one forward (in case the enemy attacks from behind) but we also know that France's sole contribution to the defeat of the Third Reich was to scuttle their own fleet.


So while our chaps on HMS Hood were getting strafed from arsehole to breakfast table in the Denmark Strait by the Prinz Eugen and the Scharnhorst, the cheese-eating surrender monkeys were wading ashore at Algiers for a pastis before dinner and legging it to Vichy.

Apparently a key element of the new deal is that Royal Air Force planes will be operating off the aircraft carrier Charle de Gaulle. I trust there's a clause in the treaty whereby, in the event of the ballon going up again, we're given notice to get our planes off before they sink it themselves.

A quote from the communique on the 10 Downing Street (British equivalent of the White House) website is:-

"We will establish a bilateral Joint User Group to facilitate co-operation on the development of A400M training to inform operating techniques and procedures as well as exploring opportunities for synthetic and live training."

Which roughly translates as "Keep your eye on the bastards or they'll be down opening the sea-cocks before you can say Aboukir Bay."


As a friend of mine says "Arc de Triomphe? - which triumph would that be, exactly?"

Indeed.

1 comment:

Kathie said...

Could you two apply your fine legal minds to exploring with local historical scholars as to whether this entente might somehow violate the Treaty of Windsor, between England and Portugal? After all, Winnie invoked it more than a half-millennium later to get the then-British airbase built on Terceira. So it's not entirely infeasible that the treaty's still viable, and some binding fine print could be located that might violate Franco-Portuguese relations?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treaty_of_Windsor_(1386)

Just askin'...